The clock had struck 7 O’ clock in the evening and everyone in the office started to feel restless to go home. But the weather didn’t permit this. It was a windy rain lashing outside with the thunders emulating the emotions of bereavement. So, everyone in the bank was compelled to stay beyond their regular stay.
Varun also had to stay, but he was not mentally present there. I always liked him but could never tell him. You know there are some things that seem more logical and rational when they are left unsaid. And on top of everything, I considered Varun a bit haughty, so my liking for him was only limited to a feeling of happiness that I used to experience while seeing him. Otherwise, I was not a very big fan of his behaviour.
He was senior to me and he was senior to some five other employees and everyone was of the view that he was a snobbish person.
Anyways, the rain had let up and at around eight p.m all employees started to leave the bank. I also left with my friend Madhvi on her scooty.
“How is uncle Ragini?”
“You know Madhvi, sometimes I get fed up with his eccentric behaviour. He is not at all being able to accept that fact that mom is no more. On many occasions he behaves as if he has turned a psycho. He never takes his medicines for blood pressure on time. He never listens to the nurse either. He has stopped taking the walk in the mornings and moreover he seems to have lost all his interests in life.”
“I understand Ragini, but now you both will have to tackle the vacuum of the loss created by the departure of aunty together.”
“I am ready and willing to fight the vacuum but he seems to have resigned to the situation. You know Madhvi, yesterday he passed urine in his pants itself. It seems that he has lost all his interest in leading an active life. I feel really helpless sometimes. I cannot watch him dying every day,” I said sobbing.
“Keep patience Ragini, things will look up,” consoled Madhvi.
“Stop the scooty here Madhvi, I have to buy diapers for my dad.”
That night my father complained of uneasiness. The nurse, whom I had employed to take better care of my father, called the doctor and he advised to bring my father to the hospital immediately.
I hired a car and reached the hospital as soon as possible. There, he was immediately given the emergency injections to make is condition stable. After an hour he was feeling ok. But the doctor advised to make an overnight stay for his better improvement.
All the sudden happenings of the night had really left me exhausted but I didn’t feel even a wee bit of sleep. Since there was rain in the evening, there was a cool breeze blowing. I decided to take a stroll in the gangway of the ward.
There I saw Varun. He also saw me. I analysed quickly that there must be some emergency in his family as well. So I went up to him and asked, “Who is sick?”
He kept mum for thirty odd seconds and said: “It is my sister… and what brings you here?”
“It is my dad,” I replied.
“How is he feeling now?” he asked.
“He is feeling relaxed now… how is your sister feeling now?” I asked.
But he didn’t answer and kept staring outside of the window of the gangway. I thought that his arrogance was again at play.
But then after being quiet for sometime he said “She cannot tell me how she is feeling... she is in a situation of coma for last two years.”
This piece of information made me feel ashamed of myself as to whatever I was thinking about silence of Varun.
“Would you like to meet her?” he offered.
I went and I saw how a girl in her mid twenties (that is considered full of life) was lying lifeless on the bed.
“She is Ragini…she works with me in the bank. What you said? You like her…ok. ok… I will invite her on your birthday,” Varun kept talking to his sister in a way as if she was imbibing everything that he said.
Later he told me that in an accident he lost his parents and that accident made his sister go into coma.
During my stay in the cabin of his sister, I didn’t see any lines of impatience or hassles on the face of Varun. He was handling a literally difficult situation with the maximum of ease. Then I realized how impatient I was in my behaviour with my dad. Together Varun and his sister were facing the challenges of life head on without any gripes and grouse, whereas I was full of complaints about my situation.
Meeting with Varun and his sister, changed my attitude towards my own situation at hand. I started to see rays of optimism in case of my father as well. I handled my dad patiently and gradually he returned to normal. Now we go together to meet the sister of Varun in the hospital.
And yes I have confessed my liking for Varun as well in these days, because you know what, when you say things, situations of life seem to sound more logical and rational in comparison to when things are left unsaid.